Do you think this counts as emotional abuse? or just a bad relationship?

I can empathize with you completely, having a mother that was almost IDENTICAL to this, minus the "controlling" factor. I just have to say first off, you are an ADULT. What is keeping you in contact with your mother when she won't hear you out about anything and treats you like crap? Does she pay for your college? Apartment? If not, you need to give her an ultimadum. Either she hears you out and listens to your concerns or you don't need to have contact with her until she does. Just because she is your mother doesn't give her the right to abuse you and does not give you a reason to take that abuse.